Day Five: Bath Time

OK so the war zone of the day has been bath time. Last night when Amber got her bath she told me that she was sore "down there" and so I told her to wipe herself with a clean rag and then she said she was fine.

So tonight I tell her that she needs a shower because when girls get to be big girls they need to take showers so they dont get sore. I told her that I had to do it when I was little and I had to stop taking baths. So the argument began, a man I tell you what, kids can come up with every excuse in the world!

" I wont use soap"
"I don't want too!"
"I don't like showers"
"I wont sit down"

....and the list goes on.

Finally I told her that if she did not take a shower like I was asking her nicely to do (never raised my voice at all) then she would not play with the kittens tomorrow.

It worked! She pouted and griped but well it got the job done. Tom was outside the door while I was talking to her. I was trying to relate to her being a girl and letting her know that big girls need to do things differently than little girls and it never registered.

Now, that Ive laid it all out there for assessment, I now have my own feelings about it.

I am so torn when I talk to her about things like this when they possibly upset her. I do not want her going back to her mom and telling her mom that I was mean to her when I was not. Especially, when her mom does not know the entire story (I don't want to talk to that woman either). But that's my dilemma. I have to be a parent figure to this little girl and all the while Im afraid of something being said that is incorrect. I'm sure I am not the only step mom that has been through this.

I try to talk to Amber and tell her why she has to do or not do certain things and sometimes they get through and other times its like a brick wall.

That's where I know she is Toms child because the stubborn steak is completely a Moore gene!

I really need some insight on this one. When it comes to, not really getting onto her but its telling her that she has to do something that she does not want to do.

Also, when I tell her that she needs to do something I make sure to sit her down and calmly explain to her WHY she is having to do this thing. It does seem to work but when I talk to her she stays quiet. More than likely blocking me out but at least I know in my heart that I am doing the right thing. I am not scolding her or yelling, I am talking to her like a little girl and trying to make her understand that she is growing up. I do not want to treat her like she is 4 years old.

So this is my day. LOL, earlier today has been really great. We played Monopoly again and she kicked my butt without cheating, then was painted and I even got to watch and TV show during lunch time. So all in all I feel more confident with her. Except for times like tonight I need to know that I am handling these ordeals correctly.

Believe me I know there is not handbook but there are women out there that have been in my shoes and can tell me the experiences they had and what they did. I am not looking for a manual I am just looking for suggestions.

Thanks again for reading yet another lovely blog courtesy of my world. :