There are times in all of our lives that we just wonder why we are here? What are we supposed to do? How do we provide for ourselves?
I honestly wonder what has made my life so difficult?
Alot of people on the outside looking in would tell me that the path that I chose is what lead me to the hole I am in right now. But I dont see it. I do not see myself choosing to have to struggle this hard....
And seriously if I hear the word "economy" one more time Im gonna scream. Everyone and their brother is screaming that word at the top of their lungs when most people dont even know what the definition of that word is.....
I dont want to worry about my next meal or how I am going to get the essentials for myself again..
Well, without a vehicle and no prospects of a vehicle I have no idea what to do. Tom works too much for me to have a decent job and to take me back and forth so yeah...Im stuck
So that leaves me with providing for myself. I am going to start making things from home and selling them. I will make flyers to post at the grocery stores and tractor supply to try to make myself and my family some money.
Things such as home made room and fabric sprays, hand sewen pillows, crocheted pot holders, theres really not much that I cant make by hand. I have a vast number of things that I am going to start to make and sell but I dont want to give everything away! Everyone is just going to have to see my new page where everything will be displayed.
I will overcome all this madness, This time next year I will not be broke and hungry....
This time next year I will have a car, a life, a job, and extra money, gosh....I think Ive forgotten what money feels like in my hands...it slips away so fast that Ive forgotten the smell...
And what makes all this even worse is that Christmas is coming and I have a step daughter that we wont even get to do anything for. Its not her fault that her Christmas has to be ruined because Daddy and Amanda have no money. Shes too young to understand....
Wow that was alot to type but I really feel so much better. I have slacked off blogging because I was in a really bad rut.
Things have gotten so crazy and I was worrying about everyone elses life so much that I temporarily forgotten mine.
Though its worth it.
I love my family, they mean the world to me so yall who read this please dont think that I regret a second of it.
I hope yall still love me and know that I am here for you but its time for me to take control and do something and stop feeling sorry for myself. I am not the only one going through this mess.
Til we read again.
Im out
Manduh :)
